makes me want to scream

I sometimes ask myself why is it that I make decisions that I really do not want to make.  Sometimes I think that I am stronger that I really am and that I can deal with it, but then reality strikes and I realize that I can not and that someone probably needs to punch me in the face to wake me up to the reality that I clearly can not see. But then there are those times when I do something and no matter what happens that makes it feel like a bad idea, I still feel peace about it when I go to sleep.  I guess all of this is a mess because I am a little bit of a mess.  I guess that is why sometimes I just want to scream because I am so freaking weird.  I like being weird.  FYI, I really really REALLY need to clean up my room and as soon as I do that I will have pics of my little piece of comfort.